Thoughts

Part of my reasoning for starting this blog was to give myself something. An outlet, a hobby, and it’s helped me to take more time and use my camera for the photographs I’m using. I spend so much time worrying about my kids and my partner I forget I exist too. I forget that I have a purpose, a life. That I am a human outside of mom and wife. So this is for me. 100%. Wholeheartedly. Me. I spend so much time trying to escape my reality through the books I read, through working out but that’s all I give myself. I don’t know why but I feel guilt for wanting a little bit more. It’s not that I don’t want to be with the kids or whatever but I am the only one home most of the time. Which is ok. I love my family a lot. I’d give them everything and then some. But I’m learning that I need to be ok first. So this is a part of that process for me. I also decided that even though I don’t drink a lot, I was drinking a drink or two daily that I’m stopping that, I just found that it really bothers my anxiety. If I want to be ok, I need to get my anxiety under control to. So here’s to the future and me creating the best version of me. For them.